I'll never forget you
by Anchored Down
Summary: A collection of garbage I can't even begin to apologize for. Will be updated not-so-semi-regularly as last time I promise to do anything it fell through. In celebration of the 100yr anniversary of WW1 and my 3 years with the series, if you had told me I'd STILL be writing fanfiction about these punks 3 years ago...I'd probably believe you.
1. Gender Identity

**a/n: yeah so I know this one might piss some people off but I can't express how much I just really don't care about you or your transphobia. **

**Little bit of a warning though since Deryn is canonly bi gendered, and gender identity wasn't exactly a concept in 1914 I switch between male and female pronouns a lot, but just know I'm only referring to Deryn/Dylan. **

**Thank you so much for reading, Gabe **

Dylan straightened his tie, then straightened it again.

From somewhere in the back of his mind the image of Alek smirking made him ripple with unease.

When he- she- _he._

_He. _

When he first decided to join the air service it had been simply out of a need to fly, but lately the young Scott had been slipping away from his former female identity. Sure, she'd always firgured herself- hisself- _whatever _a tomboy growing up but what he felt now was something completely different. He- She- _He _had become so immersed in the idea of being Dylan it was as if she'd- he'd- she'd- HE'D actually been born Dylan. It just felt so right, so natural, and it was all so damn confusing. The more confusing it got, the more frustrating it got, as he didn't exactly didn't have anyone on the ship to confide in.

The prudish clankers wouldn't touch this with a ten foot pole, let alone actually listen to his side of the story.

And her fellow darwins? That'd just get her kicked off the ship and sent to jail...or worse hung!

Dylan gave a final frustrated sigh, giving up on straightening his tie. Something uncharacteristic of the always well dressed midshipmen. With sudden resolve he looked at his reflect, gritted his teeth and growled.

"Ma, God, and law be damned!" A fervent rage filled spread through his stomach. "I'm more happy than I've ever been! I'm the most alive I'll ever be again if I have to go back to skirts and corsets! I don't care- I'll be Dylan Sharp for the rest of my life!"

He- His- Him.

That was the day he'd finally become the man he was meant to be.


	2. Be not afraid

**a/n: if these have any grammar or spelling errors please understand this are kinda slapdash-ish in effort to be able to balance a job, a girlfriend, and college. **

**Also I'm a lazy asshole but let's not go pointing fingers here!**

**This drabble is a modern day au, it's also based off the song ****_When you can't sleep at night _****by Of mice and men, and if you haven't heard it please go look it up!**

**I might continue this one I don't know, tell me if I should I gues?**

**Thanks you so much for reading, Gabe.**

_Pretty little lady with the swollen eyes will you show them to me?_

_I know that I am not perfect_

_but you stay awhile _

_baby, then you will see _

_Miles away I can still feel you lay your head down on my embarce_

_Be not afraid _

_to love_

_me _

It was hard, loving someone who lived so close yet so far away. It was harder when the person you loved was crying their eyes out and all you could do was whispered soothing words over skype, because your parents were sleeping down the hall and you'd stayed up until 3 a.m. on a school night again.

But it was worth it- god was it worth it. Like when she smiled from ear to ear, or when you heard that laugh (god that laugh), and especially now when you were just hours away from finally getting to see her in person again for the first time in years.

"I love you, Deryn." Alek smiled over cam.

"I love you too, Alek. Now get some rest."

"You should do the same...god, Deryn I'm so nervous."

"Me too, dafty. But it'll be okay...I promise. G'night."

"Night." He could barely contain his smile. He imagined holding her and kissing her and-

His stomach and smile dropped instantly. There were footsteps outside his door.

He snuck back into bed just as someone opened his door. Maybe it was just one of the servents checking on him...

That proved wrong as the dark figure shuffled into the room, opening a drawer. The servants wouldn't dare steal from him! Unless...it was something more cynical. His father's warnings rung in his ears _You've had enemies since the day you were born. _

you know how it goes from there right? ye? should i continue or nah?


	3. Props and mayhem

**(A/N:) hey it's me, trash king again with another hit single from dumpstervill: doomed old gay men are ruining my life. The melody of the song is my crying, and the bassline is me wasting my life.**

**anyway- I hope you enjoy this...whatever it is.**

**thanks for reading...if anyone actually does read these things...**

**- gabe! **

Inane fic that's very soap opera-ish

It had been years since Franz had thought to visit his family's vacation manner. He did not care much for it, but he knew Ernst needed to get away. Ever since the news of his betrothal to a Germanic countess his best friend had seemed rather down. The two had spent most of their first day exploring the home, eventually settling into dusty music room located in the back most regions of the manner.

Sun shown through the large windows as slender fingers ran over dust covered keys.

"I've never been too good at such whimsical things." Ernst muttered as he began playing Beethoven as if it were but a major scale. Music filled the room and Fanz scoffed, watching his friend from the piano's side. He would never ceased to be amazed at how talented his friend was. "Ernst, I do not understand you."

"What is there to understand, your majesty?" Ernst smirked.

"Ernst, you know I loath that title." The future archduke leaned on his hand. "I simply cannot comprehend how talent you seem in all fields. By god man, Countess Wilhelmina must be very impressed with you."

Ernst stopped playing, his face screwed.

"Ersnt...I'm sorry I shouldn't have-"

"No, your majesty. It's quite alright. I suppose it's not the worst thing in the world...she could be found rather attractive, her family name is nice..."

"Then why do you seem so down about it?" Franz moved, sitting next to him on the piano bench. "It is not the end of the world."

"I understand that...it's just..." His friend looked up at him. There was deep pain in his eyes. He'd seen it before- there were several times when his friend would call him to the side, start to tell him something, but stutter and fail.

"Whatever it is, man, you can tell me. We are best friends." Franz smiled widely and Ersnt's did too, just a little.

"I just..." He sighed deeply. " I fail to find marriage to someone I do not love appealing. Surely you understand that, Franz. You are such a romantic." It was very true that the future archduke was often found lost in his own daydreams of romance, of finding his soulmate and ruling Austria with the love of his life by his side. To remind himself of his friend's thoughts made Ernest feel as though he'd ingested chemicals. They were begging to boil over inside him.

"I do understand...but perhaps you can grow to love her."

"No, you don't understand!" Ersnt stood dramatically. His long legs strode over to the window, which he looked out of. He stared at the coast line and wished to be there, or anywhere but this room. Franz was getting too close to the truth again.

"Oh...oh I think I do." Franz smiled, laughing a little. Ernst always did have a flair for the dramatic. And the way he seemed to frown upon all his romantic ideals- perhaps just an act? Oh, finally, Franz had a decent enough idea on to his friend's secret. "You've got a girl on the side don't you! Why did you keep me in the dark about this?"

"No. Franz, it is not that simple." The young count huffed, continuing to stare out the window. Franz frowned slightly.

His friend always had so a poor view of those below his class, as did most nobility. "I believe I understand...you've fallen for someone below your station?"

"It's not that, Franz!" He watched as his friend's body tensed. For a moment he worried he'd run out of the room. "There's no girl and there never will be..."

The last phrase was muttered, almost as if he didn't want his friend to hear.

However, Ernst seemed to have changed his mind on that as he turned from the window, looking his friend right in his eyes.

"I don't- god help me- I don't like girls."

"Oh." Franz swallowed uneasily. He'd never thought his friend a- a- well, they'd been friends for so long surely he should have somehow guessed it by now. All this time and his friend...preferred the company of other men? Franz panicked, quickly trying to think over every comment, every joke he had made in his friend's presence...the topic of homosexuality was too taboo to bring up, so surely he hadn't made any sort of nasty comment around him...he hoped.

After a brief silence in which anxiety had clung to every dust molecule in the room, Franz spoke.

"I understand how difficult marriage would be for you then, but worry not. Austria is a beautiful country and it is loving and accepting of all people that have her best future in mind." He stood, making his way over to his friend. He placed a hand on his shoulder.

"Your political side is really showing itself. So calm and composed, even in the face of a bombshell...you will make a great archduke one day." Volger smirked turning to face Franz. "But...there's something else I forgot to mention..."

"What's that?" He smiled warmly.

Ernst blinked and looked away quickly.

What a damn fool he was! He couldn't tell Franz the nature of his feelings!

"Countess Wilhelmina is a blonde...I hate blondes." Franz cracked a smile and let out a hearty laugh. Volger was thankful for his friend's ability to laugh at anything, even the humorless of jokes.

"Good one, Ersnt." He continued to laughed, walking over the other side of the room.

Ernst watched his friend, feeling disconnected from his own body.

He wanted to feel joy! He told his friend the truth and his friend had accepted him with little to no qualm but...He knew that if Franz even began to suspect how he truly felt about him...his accepting attitude might change.

For the good of himself and the empire, Ernest Volger would have to get a lot better at hiding his emotions.


	4. Born to die

**(A/N:) this is so so so overdue I'm so so so sorry. I wrote this for my friend, Ashley, based off something that actually happened to Fredrick the Great of Prussia. It's an AU for my gross ship I'm sorta sorry. **

**I hope you like it and thank you so much for reading, Gabe! **

Franz Ferdinand was a moderate.

He neither stood with nor did he openly rally with the Serbs. That being said he was not in favor of the continued mistreatment of their people by his country.

Something as trivial and common as the issue of basic human rights would usually have men in this position flourishing; chomping at the bit, one might say, to take the throne and assert his own ideals.

But not Franz.

No, Franz caved under pressure. The fear of his homeland, Austria, turning against him combined with the fear of him becoming just another cog in an oppressive regime sent him running. Quite literally.

However he wasn't alone or without plan. His oldest, and closest, friend Count Ernst Volger insisted on going with him. The young count even had the perfect plan within seconds of discovering Franz's wishes to run away. Almost as if he had run this scenario through his mind before...oddly enough...

All the same it was perfect!

America.

All they would have to do is sneak out one night and meet by the stables, from there they would take horses and ride non-stop to Germany. Once in Germany they would recover for a day or two then keep on riding to France. Once in France they would acquire new passports and two one-way tickets to New York on the first ungodly fabricated ship they could find- to throw of Franz's uncle Franz, of course.

But you know what they say about the best laid plans.

The two friend's hadn't made it as far as Hanover before they Austrian royal guard had caught up to them.

They stay crouched together in the small room they had rented the day before. Fear and regret surged through the two as Ernst's hand found Franz's.

"My dearest friend," Franz gripped Ernst's hand tighter. His hands were so cold, and his voice was quivering in a way Franz had never heard before. "I am so sorry."

"It is me who should be sorry, my friend."

Perhaps...perhaps if he had just let Franz go...if he hadn't been so selfish in his romantic desires...he could have made it...

But there was no use for such thinking now. The royal guard was nearing.

"We should surrender with, at least, the slightest bit of dignity." Ernst stood tall, despite how thick and unsure his voice was. The boy who always had a plan was falling apart in front of Franz's eyes.

He nodded up at his friend and allowed himself to be gently pulled up to his feet. The two released hands and walked out of the inn, heads held high.

**_Both are to be put to death! _**

_Of course then there might not be a proper Hapsburg heir to the throne, and the country might fall apart, your majesty, and-" _

_**Oh yes, yes, I suppose you're right. Wouldn't want that.**_

The emperor's closest constituents managed to talk Emperor Franz Joseph out of killing Prince Franz Ferdinand, but made no attempts to save his count friend.

The emperor felt like Franz still had some growing to do, lessons to learn; especially if he ever hoped to take of the Austrian throne one day. And so, after much compromise, it was decided that his series highness prince Franz Ferdinand of hohnburg was to be witness for the public execution of Count Ernst Volger.

Volger was blindfolded and lead onto the stage. From there he was forced to kneel, his hands bound behind his back, and his head placed on the podium. All the archaic customs of execution fulfilled while Franz watched stiffly. He was left with a deep itching in his bones. The erg to run free, to save his friend.

Oh godswounds if he had just maned up maybe...maybe...hundreds of alternate realities to the hell he was confined to ran through his head. He felt empty, abandoned, pathetic.

And then suddenly

All of it stopped and he stood without thinking. He jumped off the balcony, an awkward 3 foot drop, and landed just as the room of aristocrats took a collective gasp.

Franz had never loathed the people of Austria, especially not his fellow upper class friends, but the way treat this...this...as the social even of the year made his blood boil.

As Franz made it up to the stage he heard his father and grand uncle behind him starting to shout a mixture of

"Hurry up!"

"Follow through with it!"

"Do it, now!"

He looked down, seeing tears from down Ersnt's face. He kneeled and grabbed his friend's hand, looking up at the executioner. "Please, don't do it."

He begged softly, hand tightly gripping his friends shaking hand.

"Franz?" Ernst croaked.

"My dear friend, I am here." He sniffed. The executioner seemed to have decided whose orders to follow, and raised his axe.

"Franz I...I..." It hung in the air taunting him. Time slowed in that moment and Franz felt like the moment might not end, like he might be stuck here holding his friends hand forever waiting for him to say what he needed.

Waiting for the end.

"I love you."

And like with all other suspended moments in time, when things look as if they might not change, this one ended.

And oh sweet god above, how it ended.


	5. Never gonna happen

**(A/N:) Another poorly edited au because holding onto a singular storyline is too much damn effort. **

**Instead of it being Newkirk to stay on the ship with Deryn, everyone's favorite bumrag Fitzroy stayed! If you don't remember him, he was the snotty one from the first squick of ****_Leviathan_****. He got booted off…but what if he had stayed aboard the whole time? Or what if he'd discovered Deryn's secret?**

**Well these are the answers nobody cares about to questions nobody asked!**

**I hope you enjoy and thank you so much for reading! – Gabe**

The worst the boy had gotten were some bruises and a minor concussion, but the way the lad was laid about the sick bay moaning and wailing you'd think he had been the one shot. Deryn normally couldn't stand to be in the same room as the pompous slimeball, but after the crash they had just had she was honestly glad to hear his whining.

"Fitzroy." Her voice was as smooth and pleasant as an abrupt cough. "Glad to see you made it."

"Aye! _Thanks to you_!" He groaned as if the very notion put him in pain. Weren't people meant to be grateful you saved their lives?

"Aye, well it wasn't anything-"

"Listen, Sharp." He held up a hand as he interrupted her. "I don't like you much, and you don't like me, so don't go making me indebted to you."

Her eyes narrowed to slits, her voice a tight but masculine snark. "Fine then. I'll remember that the next time you're falling off the ship."

It was a dead wicked thing to say. It bogged down on as she went to check on Rigby but as his wailing continued she decided he would get over it.

Barking boy.

Couldn't even be thankful when she saved his life.

…..

(Tried really hard to write him as a common white boy in this)

Fitzroy was as smug as a box of cats.

Oh, life was grand! Very, very grand!

You see just a few hours ago he had been going about his daily duties when he'd happen to overheard the most delectable conversation. Just as Fitzroy thought Dylan Sharp was hiding something! Dylan was really his own cousin Deryn!

A girl! A girl who was quite infatuated with him as well. You see he'd caught the tail end of the rest of their _girly talk_.

_"He just…he just understands me in a way no one does. He's always been there for me." _

_"Not to mention he is quite attractive." _

_"Doctor Barlow, honestly." _

It was obvious Deryn was gushing about Fitzroy. He couldn't blame her, honestly.

_Ah well, time to put the poor girl out of her misery and give her what she wants. _He thought as he sauntered in, not even bothering to knock.

Deryn looked up from the bed. He noticed she was wearing only a white undershirt and their off-duty slacks. How scandalous!

"What do you want?" He snarled in a rather unpleasant tone. He figured she was just having her time of the month and continued as planned.

"We need to talk," He sauntered more into the room, even going as far as to sit next to her on her cot. "I know the truth about you, miss Sharp."

He could see fear overpower her expression. He chuckled at how charming it was and placed a gentle hand on her shoulder.

"I mean, honestly, it explains so much! The way you treated me all this time, I thought you might have hated me…but you obviously love me! All your nasty and unladylike comments and actions were clearly just you trying to throw me off your trail!"

Her eyes narrowed to small slits again and she sat her jaw. He felt a slight fear creep up in his gut.

_Might as well go ahead and give her what she wants. _He puckered his lips, leaning into her. A rather brutal slap to the forehead stopped him.

"I recommend you taking your hand off of me if you wish to keep your longstanding relationship." Her voice was a growl, one akin to a tigeresque about to pounce.

_What the hell? How could she possibly reject me?! _"Deryn, beautiful, you don't have to pretend anymore. I heard you and the doctor talking earlier, I know how you feel about me…just give into your feelings and do what comes naturally."

"The only things coming naturally right now are homicidal ergs." She hissed, pushing him off her cot. "And for the record I was talking about Aleksander earlier."

He stood quickly. His pride deeply hurt and his bum only slightly bruised from the fall. "That's treason!"

"Hardly, bumrag! Now get out of my cabin."


	6. If I'm James Dean you're Audrey Hepburn

**(A/N:)Hi I'm thirsty for representation so, this will be a thing now. I hope you like it and...I'll try to update it more reliably than I have alternatealternate!history...which I promise is coming this week!**  
><strong> hope you enjoy and it's not...too confusing. <strong>  
><strong>Gabe<strong>

"She- Alek had blushed her way through asking Dylan to call her she when they were alone- frowned and blinked. Then blinked again.

Dylan smirked at the sight of his perplexed girlfriend. He back to when they first met, when she still thought she was a he, and had trouble understanding the service speak. The memory brought back a whole fluster of nostalgia from deep within his gut. Oh how he missed the ship! The feeling of flying with the Leviathan's squishy membrane beneath his boots…

"-DYLAN!" Alek's voice brought him back from his day dream.

"Sorry, what?" He moved to sit next to her on their couch.

"You weren't listening? uh, well." Worry clouded her face. She was debating something, Dylan realized. Like with her pronouns, how to tell Volger she'd thrown the scroll away.

Dylan threaded his hand with hers, smiling softly. "What is it, liebe?"

"My name…Aleksander isn't very feminine, is it? I was considering Aleksandra, but that's rather boring. I want my new name to be symbolic."

"Symbolic?"

"Yes. Of…my new life. I'm no longer nobility, I am starting anew with you. I want my name to reflect that."

"Dylan nodded slowly. "Do you have ideas?" The only name that came to his mind was Agnes, and didn't fit her beauty much.

"Yes…Sophia."

"His eyebrows shot up a bit in surprise./p

"It's what my parents would have named me had I been for female- well you know what I mean."She smiled a bit, but it was a self conscious one.

"Dylan smirked. He leaned in for a kiss and murmured "Pretty name for a pretty girl."

"Oh, get stuffed!" she blushed.


End file.
